GOOD LUCK/BAD LUCK

 

  Well after there we headed over to Austin, where I ended up going to jail for 45 days for assault with two other guys and the situation was gay as fuck.

  We were walking down Guadalupe St. when some dickhead kicked the dog belonging to one of the guys I was hanging out with. So we tried to beat him up but this guy was fuckin tough as nails, he got the better of the three of us but still called the cops and had us all arrested. What a faggot!

  It had been raining for a few days before I got arrested, so I was soaked. My clothes being stapled shut in a paper bag wasn’t a pretty sight after 45 days. They were crusted with mold and the guards only had a pair of gay ass pants to give me, so I walked out of there smelling like shit. The guards they let me out almost puked, ha!

  After this my mind is a complete blank, but you can safely assume all I was doing was banging chicks, drinking and shooting up. I remember I crossed the border back into B.C and headed over to Calgary. I only stopped in Vancouver for a day or so not wanting to get strung out again. The funniest thing happened when I got to Calgary. One day I was in line buying a 40oz of Big Bear. There were a couple of native dudes in front of me trying to bring back a beer that they had just bought claiming it was warm, well there was no way that it was warm coming out of the fridge. What they did was take the 40 out of the store, dumped it into something else then pissed in it and brought it back to the store. Good idea, huh? I couldn’t believe it when they gave them a brand new one. What? No fuckin way! They probably just wanted to get rid of them. Here you go, now get the fuck out of my store! Those natives are fuckin crazy, jacked up on liquor/beer. They’re the best kind when they’re sober, but look out when they hit the bottle!

  I had met this girl named Kendra that had the sweetest ass I have ever squeezed, so I stayed with her, falling in love for the month while I was in Calgary. I would have stayed there with her but I was still young and my traveling days weren’t over plus she had a four year old and the kid didn’t think much of me. For a month straight every night we would make out but she wouldn’t fuck me, which was OK because I just enjoyed her company. The one night that she was finally gonna put out I fucked up, but in a totally hilarious way. I had just got her pants down to her knees and I called her by her best friend’s name in a drunken haze, fuck! We just started laughing hard, the mood was squashed, oh well.

  Well I left Calgary on the best of terms with Kendra only to see her one more time in Montreal years later. I headed over to the C.P yard to catch an E.B.D. Man this trip had it’s ups and downs but was fun. I had passed out when I got to the yard when I got to the yard while I was waiting. When I woke up in a drunken hangover state there was a hot shot pulling out going east, so I ran up and got on a piggy back, then I looked east then west and thought I had jumped on a W.B.D, so I jumped off and watched the whole train pass by then I looked east and west again, fuckin Jesus fuckin Christ that was my train, fuck! God only knows how long it will be before another train is going to be leaving, fuck. So I sit down, open my morning 40 and drink my stupidest away. Next thing you know, the fuckin bull is driving up and down the yard, so I gave up and hitched to the next crew-change in Medicine Hat.

  I hopped on a back unit out of Medicine Hat and everything was fine but while I was sleeping, I had this dream that my train had broken up and I was just on a single engine with nothing in tow. When I wake up I see I’m not moving, so I get up to check the situation out and see that I was on a single engine with nothing behind me. That dream had come true, it was fuckin fucked!

  As soon as I figure this out, I start packing my shit so I can get the fuck out of there before the cops show up. Just as I was about to leave the door comes flying open and it was the cops. He ended up being really nice and giving me a voucher for a place in town for a hot meal, so that was nice of him. So I went into town, got something to eat and made money for smokes and beer before heading back to the yard where there just happened to be a train rolling out going my way. I ran up passing a worker that asked me where I was going and I told him “Montreal.” He pointed to the train leaving and said “that one right there,” so I went and got on a grainer, cracked a beer, lit a smoke and away I went.

  After a couple of hours on this train I was starting to wonder why I hadn’t passed Regina and why the fuck I was seeing highway signs that said I was going south. Trains always take fucked up routes so I wasn’t that concerned. I fell asleep only to wake up seeing the duty free store, fuck! So I jumped off hoping I was still in Canada, but no dice. I had jumped off right in front of the U.S customs agents in their little shack. They couldn’t believe this and I’m like “yo guys, I got on the wrong train” They ended up going through my shit but found nothing and just kicked me back over into Canada. They decided they were going to keep my pictures because I
Had one of Baja standing next to a pot plant. I flipped out, but they wouldn’t give them back to me.

  Well here is a little good luck. I explained to the Canadian customs agent about my picture situation and he told me that he would see if he could get them back for me. It was getting dark out so he showed me a place to sleep and told me that he would wake me up in the morning before he went home. So come 7:00 in the morning he wakes me up with my pictures and gives me $20.00. Fuckin right on man, thanks.

  I was a bad drunk at this time, so I was waking up every day still half cut. Point being, I had my Walkman with me and a Twisted Sister album. So I pack my shit and go sit on the picnic table, crack my morning 40 and start singing to my tunes - probably a little too loud - and causing a disturbance. Anyone who knows me knows how I am when I’m drunk and have my headphones in (What’s up Jordan can I use your phone for YouTube?) Inside Feud! With that being said, the R.C.M.P showed up and made me dump whatever was left in the bottle and almost took me to the drunk tank but luckily I had $20.00 on me so he gave me a ride to the nearest town, where I could get on a bus to Regina.

  From Regina I hopped on a train and took it to the Winnipeg yard where I got on another one that went all the way to Toronto with no problems. Lance had recently got out of jail in Arizona for stabbing someone and was living in Toronto, so I called him and we hung out for a few days, so that was cool. I hadn’t seen him for a while. Little did I know it would be the last time I would see him. He passed away a few years ago of cancer, which really sucks! Love ya bro!

  I wanted to get back to Montreal because Zoe had a place in Point Saint Charles and Matt and Dustin were almost there.